The election that was and still is & other random thoughts

General MacArthur in World War II

“Democracy is the worst form of government, except for all the others that have been tried.” – Winston Churchill

NO, this is not another election analysis, except to say “Na na na na na na, Milwaukee Journal, regarding lies told about Senator Johnson. This column will consist of whatever random thoughts come to me in the few minutes before the library closes.

1) The war in Ukraine really bothers me. A while back I said that whoever is negotiating with Russia should send a midget as the lead negotiator, St. Louis Browns style, to show Putin how serious we think he is. It would also put him on a closer to eye level with the negotiator. Maybe send in the clowns too. I found out this is not an entirely original idea.

2) Writers in flyover country really do think alike. I have a priceless copy of “Double Parked on Main Street” by David A. Fryxel. He was born in South Dakota and wrote for a Dubuque newspaper. I started writing my columns in the U.P. of Michigan, where planes don’t even flyover.

Anyway, Fryxel – in 1988 – had the same theory about negotiating that I have. In the chapter “When did ‘parent’ become a verb?” he suggested (“Babes ‘n’ arms”):

“When the arms talks stall over whether the minutes should be printed on white paper or buff, a baby could cut the tension . . A baby is a terrific conversation piece, and just wait until the baby starts crying. These tough diplomats might be toe-to-toe on missiles, but watch them melt when the baby starts crying [as if it knows what’s at stake] . .

“Parents sometimes ask the baby to say something, like ‘Tell your mother if she doesn’t stop hogging the covers, I’m going to tell her to sleep on the couch.’

“The baby could act as a third party. Of course, it would help if it came from a neutral country such as Switzerland . . The only problem I see is: Is there room in the baby’s crib for the Nobel Peace Prize?”

3) That reminds me, some Power Ball jackpots are worth more than the Nobel prizes. There must be a statement in there somewhere about the condition of society’s modern culture. But aren’t some states paying lottery winners with IOUs? That’s what it would take to get some people to take our economic crisis seriously! All I can add is, thou shall not covet lottery prizes and remember the Sabbath day.

P.S. “Lord, be my life’s prize to win; guide me through this world of sin.”

PPS: The library is closing, so I’ll have to cut this short, but here’s the quotation of the week:

“We have grasped the mystery of the atom and rejected the sermon on the mount. The world has achieved brilliance without conscience. Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical midgets.” – General Omar Bradley, November 11, 1948

As General MacArthur said, “We have had our last chance.”

Photo: A&E

Curtis Dahlgren

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About the Author

Curtis Dahlgren
Curtis Dahlgren is semi-retired in the frozen tundra of Michigan's U.P., and is the author of "Massey-Harris 101." His career has had some rough similarities to one of his favorite writers, Ferrar Fenton. In the intro to The Fenton Bible, Fenton said: ​"I was in '53 a young student in a course of education for an entirely literary career, but with a wider basis of study than is usual. . . . In commerce my life has been passed. . . . Indeed, I hold my commercial experience to have been my most important field of education, divinely prepared to fit me to be a competent translator of the Bible, for it taught me what men are and upon what motives they act, and by what influences they are controlled. Had I, on the other hand, lived the life of a Collegiate Professor, shut up in the narrow walls of a library, I consider that I should have had my knowledge of mankind so confined to glancing through a 'peep-hole' as to make me totally unfit for [my life's work]." ​In 1971-72 Curtis did some writing for the Badger Herald and he is listed as a University of Wisconsin-Madison "alumnus" (loosely speaking, along with a few other drop-outs including John Muir, Charles Lindbergh, Frank Lloyd Wright and Dick Cheney). [He writes humor, too.]